Mind Blown

Have you ever seen the Sonic commercial? The one with the two guys sitting in the car outside of Sonic, and one of them is recording every time he’s had his mind blown in a notebook- he’s on like number 46 or something…

Well, that was me this past week.

This semester I have REALLY been struggling with my lesson plans, they weren't making sense, and were coming out not at all how I envisioned them in my mind; This week it all changed when I experienced multiple “booyah!” epiphanies, and boy they were major. For all of you Education majors out there, please let me explain.

All this time I have been trying to manipulate what I already had figured out, in order to fix in the templates predetermined structure: the “I do, you do, we do” and the “reading the text/ensuring comprehension, collaborative or individual interpretations”  and so on, when my thoughts didn't necessarily align with these perfect little boxes.

Some other pretty dandy learnings; I have always thought the “review/reflection” and the “extension”  was something carried out at the end of the lesson- I was creating these whole other activities, and frankly, I couldn't understand why… then after a conversation with my teaching partner, Kayla, she told me something amazing. That this was the things you do when a student needs help DURING the lesson, or when a student breezes through it, what I would say to him/her. I've been doing these things all along! BOOM! Mind Blown!

So… needless to say, I’m a lot calmer person here and now, then I was about a week ago- when I was pulling my hair out and LOATHING lesson planning; something that as a teacher, I’ll be doing a lot of, and should make friends with. Already, we are getting A LOT more comfortable together…

Re framing Insecurities

In preparation for teaching this week I want to think about where I've been, and where I’m going. Having taught at Burrillville High School I had some really great feedback from my cooperating teacher- work on my teacher presence, get comfortable with silence and wait-time… so this time around I have some personal goals for myself- having concrete and clearly written lesson plans- because lesson plans are something I truly struggle with, I’m looking to prove that I can create a SOLID lesson plan. Really considering the in’s and out’s of it, and understanding each part of the whole. This means changing my writing from “for me” into “for others.” This “grocery list” concept really hit a nerve for me and I need to change this bad habit. A.s.a.p.

I also want to have a better understanding of the students’ grade level and what they are capable of- I feel like I constantly underestimate what students are capable of, and I need to up the ante.

Then there comes the goals of teaching with a partner; I think it’s easier said than done. I don’t want it to be super scripted, as in, you say this, I say this… so I suppose I’m looking for equal give and take- the good ‘ol ebb and flow.

I think this sum’s up the bulk of my insecurities, but will put a nice pressure on myself to live up to… Wish me luck.

Grab Your Roller Skates

I had the opportunity to follow a special resource teacher at Nathan bishop, she was not only enthusiastic about showing us the in’s and out’s of her day, she proved to be a genuine inspiration- “Get ready to put on your roller skates!” she said to Kayla and I, and indeed we had to. Mrs. Rebelo has been in quite a few different schools, wearing a grin from ear to ear, she relates how much she loves it here at Nathan Bishop.

Mrs. Rebelo is constantly moving from room to room; always ready to roll- she literally needs to be on the same page as four different classroom teachers, their students, and each of the classroom’s curriculum's  This in itself is a feat, but the fact that she does it well is another. She knows each of her student’s names and provides a different service in each of the classes. She goes on to tell us how each teacher relies on her in different ways when she is present- some go so far as to let her teach the class, while in others, she stays out of the central point of view, all the while buzzing around the room; she provides students with an extra ear, or helps with classroom management when needed.

While Mrs. Rebelo  is there fundamentally for students with special needs, she makes it a point to say that she is not just there for them- but instead is there for all of the students in the room. She cringes as she states how much she dislikes when she is termed a “special education teacher,” she is a teacher through and through, without any restraints when it comes to teaching any and all students.

I thoroughly enjoyed rolling from room to room, but can happily admit that it was nice to take the skates off at the end of the day- what Mrs. Rebelo does is not easy- and I give her, and all of the other teachers out there like her, full and complete credit. Rock and roll sistah. 

Spending Monday at Nathan Bishop Middle School I remembered quickly just how much I love being in the Middle School- Students are inquisitive while still trying to figure out who they are as individuals- While this is true for the High School as well- Middle School kids take more risks, are more apt to stretch their necks out farther in their search for self identity. I remember how awkward I was at Kickemuit Middle School- The towns had recently regionalized and I was nervous for the influx of new faces that I wouldn't know- that wouldn't know me. With the help of my teachers, the transition was made easier than it could have been- that’s the thing- as a teacher you still have such an impact on students. A bigger window to influence them more- It’s still possible at the High School level, but that window becomes just a tad bit smaller.

Having spent some time in Nathan Bishop before, I was excited to see if the school was how I had remembered it in my mind- It is that, and so much more- gorgeous spacious hallways, classrooms filled with the latest technology- a SMART board in each room, comforting lighting and the most perfect sized chairs and desks; all in all, a Middle School teachers dream working space. The most perfect beginning to inspiring all of those miniature minds.

Then there’s the aspect of my teaching partner- Kayla and I have been itching to get a chance to work together and now it’s finally here. I am hoping for her technological enthusiasm to rub off a bit on me. It seems perfect to be able to do it in a classroom like this. Technology and I have never truly made friends. I still think of her as that person that it outside my main circle of friends- making me nervous because I don’t really understand her and thinking that she is wayyyyy to smart for the likes of me. But, here and now, I feel like anything’s possible so I’ll give it a go. That’s the way Middle School makes me feel. Like anything’s possible. 

"Mirror Mirror on the Wall"

After being observed on Thursday I took some time to reflect on the comments by Dr. Johnson and the comments that my cooperating teacher, Ms. Ricci has given me all week. While I thought the lesson went well over all there were aspects that I immediately knew had to be corrected for this specific lesson and then aspects of logistics that I need to work on for every lesson here on out-

I will start with the specifics of the lesson that I know need to be changed- these include hand written directions for the “column-note-taking strategy.” This would have ensured that the class was on the same page instead of Rachel and I having to go to each group and clarify what we wanted them to be doing. The grouping for the activity should have been pre-done. So either having the desks already in groups or making sure the layout for the groups provided the class with adequate workspace for their desks- many of the groups were squished on one side of the room, while the other half of the room had plenty of space. That having been said we also should have consulted with Ms. Ricci to find out how she implements grouping. The journal prompt, or as Dr. Johnson put it- “the thesis I wrote on the board” at the start of the class, should have either been cut down in length or provided as a handout.

Then there are the particulars of being a teacher that transcend the lesson and should be used every day in the classroom- always having a purpose and providing students with the scaffolding to make connections to make it meaningful both to the lesson and the student. I should always make sure I know how to accurately pronounce certain spellings of words, which is a form of misinformation that is simply negligent-  Making sure my voice is clear and concise when speaking is important not only for students to understand me, but also should include a tone of authority.

All In all it was an experience I greatly enjoyed, and look forward to doing again… only with less mistakes J

Where the Rubber Meets the Road

I have often wondered if this is something I am going to be good at- this whole teaching thing- I can be flighty, and my eagerness can often seem childish, my thoughts often looking like a cluster and not very linear- teacher material?  No I don't think so.

But then I take a step back for a moment and I remember all of the reasons why I chose to pursue teaching-
My love for language, for literature, and the endless knowledge to be explored. The endless worlds still unread, still undiscovered.
The way it feels when I know I have made a difference, made a connection with one student. or better yet, all of the students in the classroom.
That slightly bubbly feeling when I realize I have contributed to something bigger, greater than myself- The hope that my students will be, in essence, smarter than me, than all of their teachers.
They say those who can't do, teach. So why then, do we employ such an education system at all? if not for students to be taught, to be guided?

I have come to recognize my limitations, my short-comings shall you say. My weakness is my inexperience. I know I do not know everything- nor will I ever. I accept these things as calmly as I accept my severe klutziness, or as my sister Abi terms it, that I am "spatially challenged."

So- I am klutzy, and sometimes a goof, but I also know I am smart, and there's nothing more exhilarating than the opportunity than comes with nurturing young minds to discover who they are, what they believe, seeing a new viewpoint on the world around us.

While a job in some cases is simply that- a job to be undertaken and completed fitting neatly and tidily into a 9 to 5 slot, A teacher's job is never finished, or "off" at five, or weekends, or summers. It is a way of life that asks each teacher to be better- to do better-

It is the path I choose, and choose to be good at, because I will be.

Still Burning

The moon is still up when I leave my house and the sky black- The drive to Burrillville a long one, as the unraveling highways bring me farther and farther through the changing leaves of Rhode Island.

My cooperating teacher has started working at Burrillville High School in 1994- Here, in 2012, she is still there. She states matter of factly that this is because she is loyal.

I am acutely aware of her easy energy and relationship with her students that both gives and receives respect- she is calming to be near, and gives off good vibes to all of those around her-

She is inspired by her peers, by her students, and get this- by teacher candidates such as myself and Rachel. After getting the opportunity to observe and assist in her classroom she relates that she loves having us, and that she looks forward to being inspired by us- but here, at this moment, I am the one inspired. Inspired by her focus and drive to challenge a system set in place by those who have no place doing so.

She is enraged; enraged by legislation that is mandating her to put state testing and scores above her students, and their needs. Forcing her to change the way she teaches, the ways, in which she knows through her years of her 18 years of experience, that her students learn best. But instead of fuming and doing nothing about it; she realizes that the system in place is a faulty one, and she finds ways to incorporate testing and standards into her classroom, while remaining a student driven /focused environment.

I look forward to my remaining time here at Burrillville High School- Look forward to learning from someone I both respect and admire, and one day hope to emulate in my own future classroom.  

Growing up I was gangly and awkward- knobby knees on much too skinny, stalk-like legs. Big nose. Even bigger ears. My older sister nick-naming me “Dumbo” even before I could properly walk. 

I have always known that teaching is something I wanted to do, have known it since I was little, as I looked forward to September and New England’s changing leaves. To this day I still enjoy picking out my folders and notebooks, my pens and highlighters. The smell of my books, somewhat musty, like the attic waiting to be explored on a rainy day- with the trunk filled with my mother’s old dresses from the dancing school her and my father used to run- overflowing with brightly colored fabrics of scratchy taffeta and chiffon.

I am aware that something is changing, subtle and slow, like the tide going out.  This is the feeling I have as I look forward to beginning my teacher candidacy at Burrillville High School. Things are changing, propelled by the pull of the moon and the rotating planet, I feel things are exactly as they should be- I am exactly where I am supposed to be. Although, I admit that I do not always feel this unnerved- especially after I have just woken up from the nap I’ve taken in my car and rush off… to class, to work, to home… just to do it all over again the following day- on too little sleep and with the help of a large steaming mug of dark roast coffee- one sugar and light on the cream.

I know this next semester at Rhode Island College is going to go by much too quickly- leading me on to student teaching and then on to life after graduation, to resumes and countless interviews.  So while I am anxious to get started, to do what I have wanted to do since I was little- I am going to try to slow it down- to enjoy the process while I’m in it- to learn from my peers, my cooperating teacher, from my professors Dr. Johnson and Dr. Cook, as well as from myself.  I know that I still have a ways to go and that I’m going to make mistakes – but what’s the road without a few of Rhode Island’s pot-holes along the way?